Sarah and John Adopt: Musings of a Future Adoptive Mom

So, I have been trying to put myself in the position of a woman who is having to make the choice to parent, terminate her pregnancy or place her baby for adoption. Of course I have never been in that position, but when I was a college student, I had people close to me who did have to make those difficult decisions. I believe that a woman should be able to choose whatever is best for her and her baby at that given time in her life. I have come to the conclusion, as someone who has yet to have a viable pregnancy, that I cannot and will never be able to fully understand the emotions that go along with such a decision. All I can do is make our family available in the case that a woman wants to place her baby and finds our type of family suitable.

What makes a family suitable?

I guess first of all, we have to pass a bunch of health and criminal screenings every year for our home study, so there is that, but can that really be it? I don't think so, only being healthy and having a lack of a criminal past does not a suitable parent make! (Though we have squeaky clean pasts and that certainly is good!) There are other factors as to what will make us the family for our future baby. There is so much that brings people together. Think about how you met your best friend or your significant other. What sort of predestined things occurred to create that scenario where you first met or saw each other from a distance? When you first talked to him or her, what made you feel connected? I think the woman who will be our baby's birth mom could very well be brought to us in the same serendipitous way. I often wonder these things: Will she be drawn to us based on our geographic location? Our love of music? A look in our eyes in the profile? A tiny detail we mentioned in the profile or in this blog? Will she see something in us that just calls out that we are the right people to raise her child? What about us will she find suitable?

I have had so many adoptive parents tell us that when it is the right person, she knows and you know. Just like when you meet the other most important people in your life. I can't say that I have heard that all of the situations turn out like that. Some are last minute, so you do not have that time to get to know her beforehand. Sometimes she wants more privacy, but she still has to decide that we will parent her baby. Something about us has to pop out at her. It's like you want to include every detail about yourself just in case she loves UGA or Frank Turner or curling or even cats. Does she want her child's parents to take him or her on vacations around the world? Does she have dreams of her child playing musical instruments or joining sports in school? Do our dreams for our children align? I personally just dream of giving our child the opportunity to do any and all of it if they choose to.

I guess we wont know until it happens. For July, we have very little going on after this weekend. We went to two housewarming parties this weekend. We are partied out and over-filled with tasty food. John has some time before the next curling bonspiel and the beginning of the upcoming curling league. I have taken up yoga and am looking into possible kickboxing classes. I have to decide this week if I want to take a class for my master's program in the Fall. I feel like I have nothing to lose, but the cost of books, if baby comes and I can't hack both, since my job pays tuition. I do hate to waste any resources they may be putting towards it though. I have a tendency to try and juggle a lot at once to make the wait feel less excruciatingly long.

Well, here we sit, waiting for our baby as always. Hoping for the right phone call, email, or text (YES! We can be contacted via text now! 408-414-7245) . Google voice had absolutely no Georgia numbers, so we had to be assigned a California area code. Odd. Anyway the texts go straight to my cell phone and also our email sarahandjohnadopt@gmail.com, so I can get them immediately.

Check out the cover photo with our contact info that I made for our Facebook page!

That is actually the inside of our crib! So ready!

I leave you with a series of photos I found of John and I over the years. I was looking over old pictures and thought, how lovely it is to be with someone for so long and still get excited to see his face day after day.